As a child, Mallory only ever wanted to belong. As the youngest of three, with two older brothers she looked up to, it was Mallory’s goal to make her mark and let her presence be known. That’s how she ended up being a competitive athlete.

But at some point Mallory faced a competitor that was a little harder to smack-talk. She faced a competitor where winning wasn’t the objective. The opponent didn’t exist outside of her in the form of another player, but instead was an opponent that lived within her mind. It was an opponent someone couldn’t see. At some point her greatest opponent wasn’t an opponent on the field, or on the court. Her greatest opponent became her mental health challenges.

Though outspoken about many of her feelings, Mallory privately struggled with intense anxiety as a child that morphed into OCD in an attempt to control her anxious thoughts. With her obsessions and compulsions, Mallory also found herself trying to gain control of her anxiety through control of the food she ate. She thought eating less would make herself feel more lovable and worthy. After years of this attempt at control, Mallory found herself facing another opponent upon entering high school: depression. Seeking to ease her pain, she began self-harming and struggled with suicidal ideation until a friend of hers decided to tell Mallory’s parents what was going on.

After spending the rest of high school trying to find a treatment plan that worked for her, Mallory graduated and moved on to Northeastern University. College started off rocky with her depression and anxiety still far from manageable. As her mental health challenges came to a precipice, she was sexually assaulted. This assault led to a downward spiral that ended with Mallory giving herself two options: she would either bring herself to the hospital or take her own life. The competitive spirit burned deeper than the pain, and she decided to take herself to the hospital. Mallory, for the first time, felt ready to face her internal opponent head on.

Through the support of her friends and family, the space to talk in therapy, a dedicated breath work and meditation practice, and a sustainable self-care routine, Mallory found herself opening up to the healing process. The biggest factor in her healing came when she had the opportunity to speak out and share her story to inspire others in their journeys.

While she is still an incredibly competitive person today, she saves that for game nights and football games. With an acceptance and understanding of her mental health challenges, Mallory has learned how to be vulnerable and engage in her healing. Today, Mallory uses her story to reach back and help others so they know their voice is powerful, they are allowed to be human, and healing does indeed exist.

This speech can be tailored to middle and high school aged students. Slight changes to content will be made to ensure it is age appropriate for the audience. This can also be adapted for a parent night.

This facilitation is best for students who have listened to the Finding Help, Finding Hope presentation. It is a debrief to allow students the space to share their own thoughts, feelings, and stories after listening to the presentation.

Debrief group comes with questions tailored to the students needs. This is finalized and sent in two weeks before the presentation. A counselor or staff member must be present.

This workshop is focused on creating a safe environment to discuss the intersection of mental health and identity. These conversations are focused on understanding the stigma faced by marginalized groups and how that stigma changes the story we tell about ourselves. Through open discussion, we will explore our identities and the narratives we tell about ourselves in order to let go of narratives that no longer serve us, and make space for the new way we want to walk through the world. This workshop wants each participant to feel seen, heard, understood, and empowered.

This is a 60-90 minute workshop. This workshop is best a follow up for the “Finding Help, Finding Hope” talk, though it’s not a requirement. This workshop is also best for pre-established affinity groups (such as a GSA chapter) though that is also not a requirement. The previous are merely suggestions but should not be barriers for booking this workshop. A social worker, counselor, or advisor is required to be in the room.

This is a fluid workshop. Upon booking this workshop you will receive a sample sheet of questions Mallory uses as a guide, but this is simply a sample. This workshop is to serve the needs of the students and where they take the conversation. Mallory will serve as a facilitator asking questions, holding space, following up on threads of conversation, and ensuring the group remains respectful to one another.

Introduction: Lay out the reason this space was created, why spaces like this matter, and reminding students of the importance of their voices and respecting the voices of their fellow peers. Mallory will then ask each student their name, how they identify (if they feel comfortable sharing), and their favorite queer musician or artist. We do this to talk about representation and pop culture as our first guiding thread.

Closing activity: Ask students to reflect on how they wish to continue this conversation even after the workshop ends. We will finish with them adding their takeaway, action step, or a piece of their story through art and/or words on our “Queer Stories Matter” banner!

Stigma. Many people understand the basic concept of stigma. It is something we are maybe sick of hearing about, especially in mental health spaces. We have heard the platitudes and sayings around stigma in our endless effort to combat it. But what does it truly mean to face stigma? How does it impact our lives? How does the ripple affect of it damage communities? And how do we work to undo the harm of stigma in a climate that feels intent on bringing back so many harmful stereotypes and narratives? Mallory Gothelf has spent the last four years traveling the country as a professional mental health public speaker, speaking in a variety of schools and communities across the country, each diverse in its population in regard to race, ethnicity, religion, economic class, and political affiliation. In the 500 + speeches Mallory has given, she has spent time studying where stigma lies and how we can better understand and take care of one another. Sharing some of her own personal experiences with stigma she’s faced in our own mental health struggles, as well as stories from students she has spoken to across the country, she will break down how we can come together to ensure we are seen, heard, and understood in a world that can shun and misunderstand us. Pulling real life examples and perspectives, Mallory aims to bring you into the world of those who struggle and provide a path to be better advocates and allies for those around us. With stigma on the rise, Mallory aims to provide hope for the path ahead. This session will include a thirty minute presentation and a Q&A session to allow participants the space to ask the hard questions and hear honest answers. It will end with participants writing on a “Breaking The Stigma” banner of how they intend to take what they learned back into their own community.

The best four years of your life, college is said to be the best four years of your life, but when struggling with mental health challenges, Mallory started to wonder if that sentiment was true. Entering Northeastern University a semester late, and taking a semester-long medical leave all due to her mental health, Mallory speaks honestly about navigating the college experience while also maintaining good mental health. From childhood to college graduation and beyond, she tells her story with a lot of honesty, and a little sarcasm, to guide college students along their own journey. With practical tips and a lot of energy, Mallory provides insight and inspiration for students, reminding them that they too can accomplish their goals without sacrificing their mental well-being.

This spoken word piece takes the audience through the journey of Mallory’s journey of not just coming out, but inviting others in. In this piece, Mallory invites you to walk through the journey of understanding her identity, how a lack of understanding forced her to live a life that lacked authenticity, and how accepting her identity changed how she moved through the world.